By: Taylor Murdick, WILD Co-Chair
TW: Mentions of Relationship Violence
The beginning of October not only marks the start of the Halloween season, but also Domestic Violence Awareness Month. As a volunteer at MSU Safe Place and a POE Peer Educator, I would like to provide some information about Domestic Violence Awareness Month and ways we can support survivors – just so everyone is prepared during this month. First declared in 1989, National Domestic Violence Awareness Month has been a time to acknowledge and recognize domestic violence survivors and amplify the voices of those impacted by relationship violence. As many of us know, domestic violence holds prevalence in every community and impacts all people, regardless of gender, age, sexual orientation, race, religion, nationality, or socioeconomic status (Peterson, 2022). When talking about domestic violence, I find it really important to remember that domestic violence is not only physical; it can also take the form of emotional, financial, technological, academic, sexual abuse, and reproductive coercion (MSU Safe Place). Read all about these various forms here: https://safeplace.msu.edu/info-resources/downloads#educational-handouts.
While domestic violence in its many forms can be a hard topic to digest, even for me, it is important to know how to support domestic violence survivors, especially during this month. MSU Safe Place, the relationship violence and stalking resource on Michigan State’s campus, provides many ways to support survivors on their website, safeplace.msu.edu. According to Safe Place, when helping someone who is experiencing domestic violence, specifically relationship violence, it is important to listen to them and believe them. It takes a lot of strength and courage to open up about abuse, so using supportive phrases like “I believe you” and “thank you for telling me” can be helpful for survivors. Additionally, it is really important to reassure survivors, as oftentimes, survivors of abuse are made to feel at fault for the harm caused to them. Phrases like “it is not your fault” and “you have done nothing to deserve this type of treatment” may be really reassuring for survivors to hear. It is also really important to support the survivor's right to control their own life. Survivors do not have to follow your advice or reach out to resources before they are ready – make sure that you are respecting a survivor’s choice at all times. Instead of providing advice, I find it more helpful to meet the survivor where they are at. Provide resources when they are ready and allow them agency to make their own decisions, as oftentimes their own self autonomy has been taken away during the abuse (MSU Safe Place).
If you are ever unsure of how to support a survivor or would like more information about what relationship violence is, please visit the MSU Safe Place website at safeplace.msu.edu. Safe Place is a free and confidential resource on campus that offers a variety of services, including advocacy, shelter, counseling, support groups, safety planning, and referrals, to survivors of relationship violence and stalking within the MSU community. Further, Safe Place serves non-affiliated members of the surrounding communities as well, as space and staffing allow. In addition to Safe Place, Center for Survivors is another free and confidential resource on campus that specializes in supporting survivors of sexual assault and violence. They offer individual counseling, advocacy, and support groups to MSU students and community members. To learn more about Center for Survivors, please visit their website at centerforsurviviors.msu.edu. On top of Safe Place and Center for Survivors, MSU CAPS is another free and confidential resource for students. CAPS offers counseling and therapy for students and more information can be found at caps.msu.edu. To learn more about resources for survivors, students, employees, and community members please visit https://supportmore.msu.edu for more information.
References:
MSU Safe Place. Michigan State University. (n.d.). https://safeplace.msu.edu/
Peterson, S. (2022, November 1). National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network. https://www.nctsn.org/resources/public-awareness/national-domestic-violence-awareness-month